Beirut Cab Stories Make me Wanna…

Lebanese Service

Beirut Cab Stories make me wanna:

– Learn how to drive

– Get a car

– Pretend I’m deaf and mute

– buy Pepper spray/taser/random self-defense gadgets

– use Pepper spray/taser/random self-defense gadgets

– burn bras in public

– hate men

– blast my Ipod’s volume to eardrum-splitting proportions

– not want to pay the cab fee

– give moral lessons about proper behavior

– give hygiene/wardrobe advice

– open the car door and throw myself out

– think if I should bother hanging on to my purse and other belongings when I open the car door and throw myself out

– cry out: “You need Jesus!” (in a Jamie Foxx in “Valentine’s Day” sort of way”)

– write a book about all the cab experiences I’ve had

– go to the Police station and report the drivers

– reconsider going to the Police station and report the drivers seeing how they’re not much better there

– get a nail clip and cut the freakishly long nail of their pinkies

– curse enough to make a drunk sailor blush

– wish that teleportation really existed

– write this blog post to vent and be able to read “Eclipse” for the second time in peace on a Sunday afternoon

Cab stories anyone?


About dimamatta

There is not much to tell... but everything to discover. *says I with a total lack of seriousness* I am a 22 year old English Literature BA holder, teaching English in Lebanon, at the Louaizeh Evangelical School. I mainly spend my time reading, writing, watching and acting in plays. View all posts by dimamatta

6 responses to “Beirut Cab Stories Make me Wanna…

  • Hala

    Had a good laugh – couldn’t agree more.

  • MoghBaba

    Why are you in Lebanon at all? Telling the Lebanese that you are better than them? yes, you are a missionary and you are a white English person so you think you are better than them. You have been chosen by Jesus (the right Jesus) not them. You know the English language (the right language) not them. You are cleaner and politer than them, etc. You are the problem, you who thinks you are better than them. I hate missionary!

    • dimamatta

      If you had bothered to look around and find out what this blog is about, you would know that I’m a proud Lebanese, lived in Beirut all my life, speak fluent Arabic, and have no background in being a missionary, and do not think that I am better than any person who makes an honest living. The blog post is a humorous one meant sarcastically, the “You need Jesus” is a film cultural reference, not any mission of mine to turn everyone into Christians.

  • MoghBaba

    I am sorry! I give up. You know, I was reading and searching something about Jesus and Christianity and the search brought me here. You are right; I did not look around your blog. I just saw that “You need Jesus” and after that this post. I admit I was too fast to conclude about you “The – English missionary white girl)!! This rapid conclusion hindered me to realize what all is about. I thank you for publishing my post and bothering to answer me. This conversation is a prime example of how wrong we humans could really be about each other as our prejudices and cultures mark other people before we really know them.

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